THE STRENGTH TO LOVE

Today is one of the days when graduating seniors from all over the U.S. receive their diplomas, listen to a motivational farewell speech, say goodbye to their classmates, and venture out into the world of employment or further study. For most students, graduation is usually a time of anxiety-laced hope. For their parents or guardians, it is generally a time of unimaginable pride as well as unspeakable relief.

This morning, we are privileged to listen to part of Jesus’ farewell speech to his disciples. It’s a privilege to listen to this particular speech because Jesus takes the time to interpret the events of his betrayal, death and resurrection even before they occur – so that when those things come to pass, his disciples will remember his words and believe in him. And when things get rough for them – when they are threatened and persecuted by Roman and synagogue leaders alike, when they have no place to call their own, when they feel that they are in this world but not of it – they will remember, remember what he said, and believe. A caring, forward-looking teacher, Jesus prepares his disciples well – he cultivates their faith, teaches them what he knows they’ll need later on, and instills in them a sense of hope.

Who helped prepare you for life?
Who encourages you to persevere in the hard times?
Who gives you a sense of hope?

Unlike today’s graduating seniors, most of Jesus’ students will remain together, continue to learn together, and face whatever the future brings –together. So while Jesus cares about his disciples’ futures, he also cares about how they will treat one another after he is gone. So, at this point in his farewell speech, Jesus invites them to behold the wonder of his life with God: “This is how God and I treat one another.” He then reminds them that the way God loves him is the way he loves them. He encourages them to abide – to remain in his love – and then he urges them, in turn, to love one another. But then he repeats it – again and again. Why does he keep repeating himself? Why is it so important to him that his disciples learn to love one another. Perhaps it is because, by the time that John’s gospel was completed – sometime between 90 and 100 C.E – the Christian community was facing persecution, threats to their lives, and in many cases, martyrdom.

How reassuring it must’ve been for them to know that:
- they weren’t alone in their beliefs
- their community would encourage them to persevere when things get rough
- God was an active participant in their lives and their community
What about us?

How might it be for us if we knew without a doubt that:
- we never have to face our struggles alone
- God is at work in every home, on every street, around every corner of our city
- there is a bigger picture for the future of the world than what we can see

But Jesus also knows what it’s like to be human – to want to give up, to run away, to take the easy way out when times get rough. So what will give them – and us – the strength to love one another in the hard times?

On this past Wednesday evening, some members of the Cathedral’s unlearning racism group, the Uyeki Forum, visited with Lynn Rossini, Director of Development of My Sisters’ Place. Lynn told us about the work of My Sisters’ Place – their commitment to providing homeless women and their children – many of whom arrive at My Sisters’ Place with only the clothes on their back – with a safe haven as well as the tools they need to return to society as productive citizens.

We listened carefully, but I suspect that what moved most of us were the pictures Lynn showed us – delightful children hugging their mothers, hanging onto a co-worker’s skirt, or striking dramatic poses for the camera. God’s children. Children who simply need to know that they are loved – that they matter, too.

During our meeting, one of our parishioners said that someone at his agency didn’t think that many of the underprivileged young people they serve had dreams. Another colleague immediately corrected that misperception. Yes, she said, they have dreams alright. Their dreams just aren’t like ours. She added, “we may dream of going to Hawaii on vacation, or sending our children to private school or getting that promotion.” All good things. The good things they dream of are a bit more basic, however: things like having enough food to eat the next day, living in their own home, not being killed by a stray bullet.

I wonder if one of the reasons that Jesus asks us to love one another is that, when we do, we do our best to ensure that there’s enough of the basics of life for all. And when there’s enough, imagine the freedom that brings.

The freedom to not worry about food, clothing and shelter
The freedom to develop and use our talents
The freedom to enjoy our lives without fear

But where do we find the strength to love others – especially when our own lives are often so challenging? After all, most of us know that genuine love often requires tremendous sacrifice. . . and sacrifice is what distinguishes ‘comfortable’ love from its genuine counterpart. The parents and guardians who are beaming with pride on this day can testify to that. But, as the saying goes, it’s difficult to give what you don’t have.

Which reminds me of the story of a man who wakes up one morning feeling very ill. His wife takes him to the doctor. The doctor examines him thoroughly but can find nothing wrong with him. After the examination, the doctor shakes his head and tells the man that he is very ill, but he thinks he might be able to help him. “I’d like you to send your wife in and wait outside for a few minutes.”

When the wife enters the office, the doctor says, “Your husband is very ill, but here’s what he needs to get well. You should fix him a healthy breakfast every morning. Send him off to work with a nutritious lunch – no junk food. Keep the house clean and free of allergens, and make sure he comes home to a peaceful, relaxing environment. Fix him a delicious, healthy dinner. Run his bath every night, and twice a week, give him a deep tissue massage. If you do these things, he will get better. If you don’t, I’m afraid he will die.”

The wife listens attentively, and when the doctor is finished, she heads back to the waiting room. Upon seeing her face, her husband’s hopeful look quickly fades. “What’s wrong, honey?” he asks nervously. Wiping a tear from her eye, she looks at him wistfully and says, “I’m, I’m, I’m gonna miss you!”

Loving others is hard work. Perhaps that’s why, before he tells them to love one another, Jesus urges his disciple to abide – stay, remain, reside – in his love – because abiding in Jesus’ love is what gives them – and us – the strength to love. The fact is that our world is so broken and the needs around us are so huge that it takes more than an hour’s rendezvous with Jesus on a Sunday morning to get us through the week. So abide in Jesus – whether we are at home or in the car, on the job or in the mall, at the grocery or in a restaurant – because that’s what will continue to empower us to love as he loves.